seasons of life

I read a quote today that said " childhood is the most beautiful of all of life's seasons" (anonymous) and I started thinking about the different "seasons" of my life.  It is amazing to think of how different each season has been for me as I have grown up and become no longer a girl but a woman. If I am honest with myself (and you) I still to prefer to call myself a girl because woman seems old and mature but in reality I am a woman. When I was a girl I thought about myself mainly. I didn't see very far beyond my own needs and wants. I was given many opportunities to serve others in the name of Jesus and that absolutely speared me on towards living as a woman who saw others rather than just self.  I thought about cute clothes and boys and what others thought of me. I had a hard time imagining myself with a husband or with a child and the thought of buying a house seemed scary.

I still think buying/selling a house is scary. I still want to wear cute clothes and I worry sometimes about how others see me. However, I know that I married the best man God had for me and that being a mom was my destiny. I think back on the hours that I prayed to God and worried about what I was going to "major" in or do with my life and now I know. I am going to be a mom. Part time to students on a daily basis who struggle with reading and math and behavior issues but also full time to my own child who I love and adore a million times more than myself. I know that saving money and working with what I have in my closet is more valuable and important than wearing the worlds cutest pair of skinny jeans. I know that giving up what I want is way harder but so worth it. I used to have anxiety about how others saw my outward appearance and now I really only care about how my heart looks.

I used to pray all the time that God would mold me into the woman of God he created me to be and I finally am beginning to believe and see that He is doing just that.

**picture of Ariccia, Italy where I spent the summer of 2004 learning and loving all things Italian